they flow together...

Thank you for the catchup mail from overseas,
In some sense, it was something that i needed,
to take me out of this silent reverie...to break through the mundane,
reminding me to be faithful in my role, the one i've been entrusted with...

Maybe i really don't get it, how this unconditional Love of God works
But at least, I'm glad to be a recipient of it,
and also, as a recipient, i know my role is to be a dispenser of it...
Hence, this paradox of not knowing, yet giving all that i can/know...

I've made many wrong calls in life, many mistakes,
but in them all, God's grace and sovereignty has helped me through,
it's not something I take lightly, not since i realised that my scars are beautiful to God,
but I must say that there are some bitter pills that never turn any sweeter really...

"...until their hearts, wounded with sweet words, overflowed, 

and their joy was like swords, 

and they passed in thought out to regions where pain and delight flow together 

and tears are the very wine of blessedness.” 

J.R.R Tolkien
"The Return of the King"

Tolkien was as perceptive as C.S. Lewis in his novels,

Only in truly knowing the King, only in knowing unconditional love & forgiveness,

only then...can we feel and know what he is talking about here...

the ironic dichotomy yet contrast of... 

hearts wounded by sweet words,

joy like swords,

pain & delight flowing together,

tears like the wine of blessedness

We know it in Christ

Evidence it in our lives

Live in the tension of such days

So that others & us...may know, truly KNOW...Christ.

Broken yet Whole

Imperfect yet Righteous

Ugly yet Beautiful

Sinner yet Forgiven

Loved...plainly Loved.