and the record continues breaking...

A father and his young daughter were great friends and much in each other's company.
Then the father noted a change in his daughter.
If he went for a walk, she excused herself from going.

He grieved about it, but could not understand.
When his birthday came, she presented him with a pair of exquisitely worked slippers, saying,
"I have made them for you."

Then he understood what had been the matter for the past three months, and he said.
"My darling, I like these slippers very much, but next time buy the slippers and let me have you all the days. I would rather have my child than anything she can make for me. "

Some of us are so busy for the Lord that He cannot get much of us.
To us He would say,
"I know your works, your labor, your patience, but I miss the first Love."

G. Campbell Morgan


Making the unspecial special,
and the special unspecial,
what curious & disgusting paradoxes we are.

What is life?

Today...after Christmas service, had lunch with the others at Holland V and waited for the longest time for our meal to arrive!

WT, Ah Seng & my meal was the last to arrive cuz they didn't happen to mention that they are run out of linguine...gosh...and it was a pretty surreal time there. I was hungry, though not anymore by the time the food came. And yeah...instead of moving too much around, i just basically sat there to stone.

I just felt such a sense of ...blehness...

thought it was cuz of fatigue, since i didn't sleep much! But my afternoon nap didn't really help much, woke up, returned the car then went for dinner...and that's when it hit me...as i looked around, i could not help but feel "bleh..." or maybe...more accurately, it was a sense of despondency, a sense of sadness...

I think it started when Ben Ooi mentioned something as he read the Liveline article on foreign workers here, and he told me how his heart was wrenched by this group of people...well...it set me thinking, and in the evening, as i was getting dinner, i was so struck with compassion for the lady who got me my yong tau foo, she has a gnarled hand...one that is stuck in a certain clench...and she was hard at work on Christmas, serving customers like me. Does your soul cry out for such as these...i know that Jesus' does

It struck me that it was just like that when Jesus came so many years ago...everyone was busy, going about life as usual, when the greatest gift was delivered and presented to us. It was such an "unknown" event, yet the most earthshaking event also...

Makes me value what i do even more...i dun care if i'm just a tiny drop in an ocean...even if i make just a small indiscernable ripple, i care no longer...it's not about me, it's about doing what i'm compelled to do, using my life to honour God in the best way possible. It is tempting sometimes to look at what i "do-not-have", yet i also see that alot of times, being content with doing my best for the least, for the lost, for those who have no capacity to repay me, that is what makes my heart truly soar...it's like...a little bit of heaven looking into those eyes and feeling that unfettered flutter in my heart. Maybe that is why i like to look people in the eye...i'm looking for heaven, to give it or to connect with some kindred soul who has that apart from the trappings of the world.

Lord Jesus, today, i realise the reality of the poverty of a world without you anew, and i see how poor i am when i overlook it too. In the richness of Christ, allow me to have a greater sense of how to live my life to the fullest, give my best, my riches, my all to bear for your kingdom work. I desire to show the Love of Christ, the fullness of Joy in You, the abundance You give, and the freedom of spirit You release, Lord, teach me so that i may show it with my life. In every season, for every reason and purpose you call me to, be glorified through me. In Jesus' blessed name i pray, AMEN

musings...

All that is necessary for the triumph of evil is that good men do nothing.

Edmund Burke

Irish orator, philosopher, & politician (1729 - 1797)

Been pondering some of these issues...
of how much that goes on,
goes on cuz we do nothing to put a stop to it.
Of how it is in our hands to do something,
but many times we relinquish our responsibility...
to speak up, to do something, to make a difference.

We let things slide, try not to disturb the status quo,
we value being accepted more than pointing out wrongs...
I wonder what Jesus would do in some of these ethical dilemmas...

Then i remember...
He who as a boy, spoke with such wisdom in the temple that people listened,

I remember the Jesus who turned the temple upside down,
when he saw that it was being used as a marketplace more than a temple.

I remember the man who ate at the table of "sinners",

who valued the harlot who broke a vial of nard over his feet,
and cleaned his feet with her hair...

He who called a man (Zaccheus) down from a tree, and in doing so...
transformed a tax collector into a man who loves...

I remember a Jesus who spit into dirt, made mud paste,
& healed a blind man through the application of the mud...

I remember Jesus who carried His own cross up to calvary,
to die there for the sins of men, and who uttered...
"Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do..."

I see all these, and i can't help but notice that Jesus never "did nothing..."
He never let evil triumph by being invisible.
Jesus was visible, His actions spoke volumes of His Love,
His obedience, His utter passion for individuals...

May this generation be a generation that seeks the Master's renown!
One that speaks up, acts out of Love, and makes a difference because of Christ!

SC Singapore Marthon'08

The run yesterday was...eventful! =)

Was battling diarrhea the previous few days and when i woke up and had to go to the washroom at 2am on raceday...i thought "die lah...there goes the run..."

At that point, i had pretty much decided to forgo the run, just wake at 3am, for the sole purpose of chauffering Donovan and Tiffany Tan to the race. Still, the old determination kicked in when i woke again at 3am, so i decided, just dress as if you are running and see how you feel at the start line. =)

Whilst waiting for Don, i reviewed the race course, and saw that we loop back to the finish line, so i decided, ok...i will try out that loop, if i'm feeling terrible, then i'll stop and just cheer them on, so yeah...told Don the plan, that i may just drop out cuz i was unwell...it was abit of a downer.

Well...to cut the long story short, i did the loop, felt pretty alright, and decided to continue, of course, it was still a hard run for me! Had to concentrate quite abit on my tummy, and i didn't really make much conversation with Don, unlike during our Sundown run. And oh yeah...i had to make 2 pitstops along the way! But yeah...i was prepared so those were pretty good and quick stops! The only worry was dehydration, so i made sure to keep drinking and drinking, and the gels we brought helped alot! =)

In the end, somewhere 3 to 4km from the end, i told Don, "Go ahead, i'm done, but even if i'll walk all the way, i'll surely finish...don't let me hold you back." At that point, cuz of the hot sun and the queasy tummy, i decided that i needed the water, the slower pace and probably the washroom again! So yeah...Don went ahead, and i couldn't find a washroom until i reached the esplanade!! hahaha! but yeah...by then i was grinning cheek to cheek already, the esplanade is just about 1km from the finish...nothing at all! So yeah...even took time to sms Rufus from the washroom "Sorry i'm late, but i'll be there soon! I'm in the Esplanade washroom" hahaha! my attempt at humour! (i just missed the timing i said i'd hit!)

the last bit of drama was really just before the finish line! about 200m away, when my left calf start spasming! yeah...cramp...totally the wrong time!! But yeah...i rubbed it down a little and carried on jogging! Seeing the guys 100m from the end was a boost! and i heard that the shots were pretty nice!! HAHA! =)

After this experience, finishing a marathon with diarrhea and having to visit the washroom twice, someone please smack me if i ever say i'm gonna run when sick! =) haha! but i think that i re-learnt some parts of myself, the steely determination part, and the practical "know-my-limits, yet wanting to push the limits" part, determination brought me to the 38+km mark, before the practicality kicked in and i knew it was not sensible to push anymore.

Mmmm...on reflection, this was a great run for many reasons, chief of which was facing and conquering obstacles, and yeah...i'm not any worse off for it, the only after effects i have from the run is a slightly sore left knee (which i'm icing down) and yeah...even did some light exercise and cycling this morning to get the muscles moving, so woo...overall, a good day yesterday! =)

I'm a happy camper! =D

Drawing near...

The story of Abraham rings out to me in this season...

Did Abraham not feel anything when God said..."Give me Isaac"?
Can it be that he was so heartless?

I can scarcely think so...

I think of him,
the struggle of emotions he must have felt,
the pain almost like mortal stabs to his heart...
the unbearable walk up the mountain holding Isaac...
the inner tears that he shed as he lay him down...
the trembling hands, shaking legs...
mirroring the broken heart...
what pain it must have been...

and then what Joy...JOY...JOY

The delight of seeing the ram, the sacrifice that God prepared...

the test of hardest Faith that Abraham had to go through...

Wow!
I wait in expectation,
You know my heart Lord
I trust in You

Turn your eyes upon Jesus,
Look full in His wonderful face,
And the things of earth,
will grow strangely dim,
in the light of His Glory & Grace