don't know why...

Tomorrow, November,
Begins the last 2 months of this year,
a year in which i've spent 5 months out with an injury,
yet been to the US, Malaysia to come
yet had Vietnam cancelled, Dec marathon...prob not running,
and lots of other disappointments...along the way

I like this Coldplay video, because sometimes...
I really wish i could live life backwards...
running through and savouring the moments in reverse,
i wonder what i would have seen then,
and what i'd catch that i first missed



Sometimes it feels like running in circles, chasing shadows...
Go so far and then back to the start,
run a race and then remember it's part of the whole race of life
And sometimes, we fail to see what we ought,
but we see what we'd rather not...

Today, i have a sense of loss...
and rather than ignore it, i think it's time to live in it,
work through it, and then learn out of it

I mourn the loss of every wasted moment,
and the dreaded ticking clock...
it can never be taken back,
yet i know that i've spent each moment as i chose...
that cannot be taken away from me

We will naturally have many things to regret,
And i surely do...a broken foot,
a colossal price to pay,
my worst ever physical injury in all my life...
took me out for months,
& i suffer the effects even now from the weather!

Missing out of Vietnam, leading a sports mission trip,
and why? because of the foot also...
So many things to regret, be angry about, get upset...
but no longer, i think those were hard moments but i've had good ones too!

The 5 month break was a good one, a needful one,
discovered the depths of friendships...
those who cared and those who mattered most
Remembered my frailty yet God's goodness,
and it gave me a sense of how to minister...
even if i were ever incapacitated...

It also showed me my natural bent...
the one to serve, the deep love that is within,
the part of me that is fiercely loyal,
and the strong independent streak

It's been a really fruitful few months back,
leading change, and seeing God work in NTU
and in individual's lives...
I wonder how much they even see the change...
yet i do, and i give thanks for it! =)

In the 5 months out, it only deepened my desire to pray,
the sense that prayer is not an "add-on"
but it truly is the greater, invisible work...
the hand of God that is present yet unseen!

These last 2 months are gonna be fast and furious,
Preparing for summit, youth camp,
a christmas that is as good as over...
and then Crusade META conference...

Setting the platform for transformation,
trusting to see the King's Glory!
and working hard at it!
Gosh...it's gonna be a rush!

Amidst all of these...
Lord, I give you all my moments again,
the bad, disappointing, terrible ones,
and the good, fabulous & thrilling moments
In your hands, you craft them all into your beautiful tapestry
Thank You! I Love You

What can i give you?
What can i say?
This is my song of worship to you =)

Musical highway

haha! today was a little funny and freeform! =)
Been on a little youtube ride and it's been so fun i think i should share some of it! =D

Started with this today, a new song from Mercyme, but the funky tune grew on me
(it may grow me out of it though! HAHA!)



Then the funkyness got me reminded of this!



And also...this!



& i ended on this nice lil note! =D
Steven Curtis Chapman, singing about his daughter!
LOVE IT!

Gonna move...

Kinda taboo to start a post this way...
but when everything everyone is looking for is just...change
Is it an innate discomfort at being...who God made us to be?

There always seem to be people around who are wandering about,
lost & uncertain, not finding their way but still pushing forward...
We see it in the rat race, that push to attain that million, that house...
that promotion, that grade...we want to "make it"

But what if those crazy things get us even more lost?
and I mean this in the eternal sense...
Maybe the most insidious lie is that we can make, move, attain all,
that in our hands we can create all we need or buy it...
However, what if this is all false?

I think that we really really are forgetful creatures,
running back to place our security once again on sinking sand,
but once that crumbles, we once again have no more such security.

That's the problem.

I kinda think differently about this...
In life, i value my pathfinders & signposts
If i were to liken myself as an individual,
I'd wanna be a tracker...

I'd trace the ancient paths, to discover the pearls of wisdom,
to find out the WHY behind WHAT we do...
I see God's Word, the bible as my signpost, a chronicle of faith,
it shows me what happens to those who follow God, and those who don't

Eventhough i'm good at leading change, i think that needs to be God-led,
As we follow God, we'd know that we're going in the right direction
If not...it'd just be like those mentioned above, a rather senseless wandering

I value pathfinders; people who have been constant in their love for God,
through the painful moments, through the good ones too
They evidence a faithfulness, a fidelity that echoes their deep Love
Pathfinders in my life have blazed the way...
they've shown me what it means to have a personal relationship with God,
how to really seek Him with ALL my heart,
and in doing so, they have given me the best lessons ever
That with God, all things are truly possible
and I need to value & guard this relationship with Him...

So many things will determine to steal that place of priority,
interesting new experiences, delightful pleasures,
there are so many appeals to our senses...
even the guarded soul would be under siege
what more the battlefield for an unguarded soul
no wonder we are told to put on the Armour of God!

I'm determined to move with the Spirit of God,
not just cave in and do stuff that is comfortable,
I need to follow the way with God in this picture,
not just move to what "everyone else" is doing,
I know where the firm foundation is...
so that means forsaking all other distractions...

I ask for simple faith, some trials to keep me sharp,
Love enough for every moment,
A desire & depth of relationship that surpasses mere friendship
Thank You Lord

In Christ Alone

Rarely do i have such wonderful days to sleep in,

rest this tired body, the aching foot, the joyful yet weary soul...

When i decided to follow Christ wholeheartedly, 

giving my every moment, spending my vocation serving others,

I probably didn't count on all these things i'd see & know,

and it has been a wondrous journey! =)

I've been so richly blessed beyond measure!
Yes, here in this expensive and inflated country, 

My means are meager, the sum i earn - a mere pittance,

however, i count it a blessing that...with little...

i still have the desire to give, the desire to bless other nations,

raising kids like my world vision one, 

and of course other missionaries who find it even harder than me,

Why are we not richer with our giving,

why do those who have more, find it harder to release it? 

Questions that blight my soul...

because I see injustices that shouldn't happen

But...there are days that delight my soul, 

when i see someone rise up, and make a stand, 

choose to use what they have to make a difference...

Today, i'll celebrate one celebrity example =)

Brian Littrell, who used to be part of the Backstreet Boys,

you brought a deep sense of home to me when i heard this,

it's not a new song, but you did a beautiful rendition of it! 

And i heard you won a Dove award? Well done! Keep shining for Christ! =)

The dancing enhanced the whole message, 

but really...it was the lyrics that hit me most...=)

So beautiful...thank you so much Lord Jesus

If i've forgotten to say it often enough recently, I LOVE YOU

In Christ alone will I glory

Though I could pride myself in battles won

For I’ve been blessed beyond measure

And by His strength alone I’ll overcome

Oh, I could stop and count successes like diamonds in my hands

But those trophies could not equal to the grace by which I stand

Chorus:

In Christ alone

I place my trust

And find my glory in the power of the cross

In every victory

Let it be said of me

My source of strength

My source of hope

Is Christ alone

In Christ alone will I glory

For only by His grace I am redeemed

For only His tender mercy

Could reach beyond my weakness to my need

And now I seek no greater honor in just to know Him more

And to count my gains but loss to the glory of my Lord

Stay on the anvil

Stay on the anvil

makes me think...

Wow...this is 33mins long, but really impactful & thought-provoking...
Do we have the tenacity to go on asking important questions like he does?

Gosh...I'm really very angry...
angry at you, crazy, stupid, reckless driver!!

How could you be such an irresponsible person?
Your lane is a NON-TURNING LANE!!
There was a stop line, a speed camera,
and a turn signal that was RED!! RED!! HELLO!?!?

The cars with the right of way were still going,
us pedestrians (also with the right of way)
were happily walking with our green man

And you...numbskull...
you had to shoot a red turn signal?!?!
& in your panic when you saw the oncoming cars
you SPED UP when heading towards us?!?!?

You really should not be on the roads...
It's not a matter of having your triangle plates up,
it's not a matter of lack of awareness...
please...in your hands...the vehicle was a weapon!

YOU almost KILLED a whole bunch of pedestrians with your driving!
For the safety of everyone, and most of all for yours...
you should just GET OFF the roads!

Yes, I'm angry, and that's why i'm ranting...
but gosh...my sore ankle is reminding me that i have a right to be angry!
I really wanted to throw my drink at your car...
if you hadn't sped off, i'd have done that instinctively...

You broke so many traffic regulations,
almost knocked down people,
then sped off like a coward after the fact...
dude...you shouldn't be on the roads...
please get yourself off it for everyone's sake...

*ANGRY*

“Because children have abounding vitality, because they are in spirit fierce and free, therefore they want things repeated and unchanged. They always say, "Do it again"; and the grown-up person does it again until he is nearly dead. For grown-up people are not strong enough to exult in monotony. But perhaps God is strong enough to exult in monotony. It is possible that God says every morning, "Do it again" to the sun; and every evening, "Do it again" to the moon. It may not be automatic necessity that makes all daisies alike; it may be that God makes every daisy separately, but has never got tired of making them. It may be that He has the eternal appetite of infancy; for we have sinned and grown old, and our Father is younger than we.”
― G.K. Chesterton

On a flight of whimsy today, maybe i'm here, maybe i'm there...maybe i'm totally nowhere...who knows?

Emancipation

Did you ever see as He does...

from the first light of dawn to the last one of dusk

Can you ever hear those cries that pierce, 

when nowadays, we live with our ears all stuffed...

Will we ever feel like He does...

or do our hearts only cringe for ourselves, and no one else...

Faith as a child...

Following...not trying to do our own thing

The pride of man makes following hard,

especially when we desire our own interests more than His

Watch...to see Him at work

Unplug...to listen

Remain Tender...so that you'd feel as He does

 

Rest...to remain, to abide, to stay in that place who only One reigns.

pinched

Whatever happened to uncomplicated obedience?
Maybe in all our smarts, all of our cleverness, we have lost this simplicity.

I think it is a shame...
and i think that it is my shame too...

If I had been faithful to follow,
maybe i'd be on a distant shore already,
ready and doing all that I envisioned over there

But really, who is to know?
Maybe my light & momentary trials are lighting a path untrodden
As I see the fruitfulness within my team,
the Joy of spending our efforts doing the right thing,
I think that all the efforts to restructure and to reach NTU has been...wonderful

Yes, it has taken alot out of me,
and it continues to be a strain, yet...
the Joy deep within is also there and never fading!
I'm thankful =)

Of yesterday, and the events that happened...
sigh...i wonder...and i wonder...
but is this one of those things that i'd never know?
really really dislike the way things turn out...

I always feel an affinity to the old testament prophets...
how did they find the obedience to do such bold, yet weird things?
How did they allow themselves to be ridiculed (Hosea), made fun of (Noah),
degraded (Jeremiah), stoned, shamed, mocked and most of all...
how many tears did they shed...?

My devotion today stood out for me...
The "Go" of Renunciation | My Utmost For His Highest

I think that i've come to the point where i understand...
tears can be selfish ones, or tears can be selfless ones...
& really...those shed on behalf of others always play a role far greater than we know,
I wonder in my darkest times, as i do this for others...
does anyone do it for me?
As unimportant & as irrelevant as that question may be...
I still feel it, maybe because when i reach such moments...
I know that i've reached that place of God where...
there is a glimpse of what His Love did on the cross...
the depth of His anguish...not just pain, but real soul deep wrenching
maybe, when we have finally plumbed such depths...
maybe then...do we finally understand calvary Love.

My confession...there are times that i want to feel God badly,
but I want it on my terms...i wish that He would send somebody tangible to do it,
someone to say those right words, provide the presence i need, that helping hand,
the whiff of kindness, the warmth of a smile, the sunlight that breaks through the clouds
& there are gracious wondrous days that this silent prayer is answered...
but of course, there are others that it isn't...

I don't rant & rail...and I've come to appreciate His sovereignty & Love.
Sometimes i realise that just looking to my own needs is what is making me whiny,
and other times, it's the sudden realisation that i'm missing God in all of this...

I like this different version, because it exhorts the character of God,
before we begin to sing of how Great He truly is!



Today...even though it still is...I give You Thanks...cuz i see your Hand

bad days...

of all the days in the world, today turns out to be one of the worst...

Started with the discovery of duplicity, deceit & deception,
triple whammy of utter badness...

Continued when that time which held so much promise,
turned out to be an unexpectedly demoralising and painful...

And maybe cuz of all that, began to feel a pincer of pain in my chest,
what started as just an ache turned into an almost tangible pain & weight,
Culminating with the heavy headedness of a monstrous headache upon leaving campus...

Now, in thinking and looking back...
I can release everything and give it back to God...
But the starting point is still tender & painful...
so much so...that i need to articulate it to help myself out...

Why? Why...WHY?
Why did you have to deceive me this way?
I can't even tell if the pain was from the initial duplicity,
or did it come from the resulting cover up...

The "acting-as-if-nothing-happened"was sickeningly familiar,
in fact, i guess i remembered it...but i wished it weren't real
no wonder there was that bad taste in my mouth...
I recognised it at the time, even though i could not pinpoint it.

And the thing that puzzles me...
weren't you the one who mentioned & protested,
against the way people were treating people?
Yet you're the one doing it now...

Even if you were never to say it...
I sense it, feel it & can even taste it...
and honestly, it's bitter & sour...
but that doesn't even match up to the pain i feel...
my individual pain...
and the pain that i feel on your behalf...

few things, and few days are like this...
curled up, fetal, almost wishing it were all a dream,
maybe a 12hr sleep will give me strength to face tmr...
maybe...

Upset max... »:((( URRRGGGGHHHHHHHH!!!!

Wendy asked some questions of us today...

And as I pondered them, 

I realised that...there ought not to be days that are ordinary,

yet, so often, it's so easy to overlook and to miss the miracles of God

Each day is a majestic picture that God paints...

yet i miss the beauty of it when i'm dragging my feet...

eyes looking, yet not seeing with wonder...

Mind on the next thing...

not absorbing the colours God places in my life...

I know this happens to me...

does this happen to you too?

A song that came to mind, 

beautiful in it's fullness of expression, 

not just the singing or the music,

but the visual imagery of skillful lyrical composition

Thank you God

You give me reason to be thankful

even when i forget to be so...
who am i, that you are mindful of me?

You who made the mountains and the sea
Measured out the universe and You made me
Echoes of the voice that called the worlds to be
Reach throughout the ages and now speak to me
You're my Creator King

You who made the valleys and the skies
Displayed Your love on far horizons and before my eyes
You who lit the stars and set the dawn in time
Called them all by name and now You whisper mine
You're my Creator King

Who am I that You are mindful of me? Yeah
Who am I that You sent Your love on me?
You're my Creator King

You who made the darkness and the light
Sun and moon to watch the day and guard the night
The hand that stretched the Heavens like a canopy
Reaches down to cover and watch over me
You're my Creator King

Who am I? Who am I that You are mindful of me?
Who am I that You sent Your love on me?
Who am I that You are mindful of me?
Who am I that You sent Your love on me? Yeah
You're my Creator King, You're my Creator King
You're my Creator King, You're my Creator King

In my brokenness...complete

I feel so...stuck

I ought to be at Playmax yesterday & now, serving...

Was asked to be...at various times, security, group host, etc...

All good, all fabulous chances to meet people and to share the word

But today, i'm so unready, unprepared, and really...totally unloving...

why? 

Maybe...somewhere in this, i'm struggling...

I've always been the Paul kind of person...

By all means, save some...so i try anything...

But today, i can't bring myself to do that...

how come?

I've spent a whole week, a whole month, maybe longer...giving

& the more i cheerfully give, the more i realise, people need more...

they want more fun, more games...more comforts, more luxuries

but they need more of mercy, more of grace, more of Love, more of Jesus

I struggle today...maybe because i see of how much the gospel centers on man, not God

We package it in fun, wonderful sights, awesome sounds, music that is great...

but we forget the the depth of words, the compelling actions of Christ that lead us to worship

In all of our playfulness & freedom with the gospel, we have lost sight of Christ...

His goodness, His Love, our sinfulness, our unworthiness...

We kind of think we have a right to the pleasures we do...

forgetting that we have no rights other than death if sin had it's way with us.

Apart from Christ...we are nothing...
In Him, we are His children, a royal bloodline, but one meant to bless not hoard.

I think i cannot be there today because i'm spent...

But i suddenly find that...maybe i do not want to be spent like this anymore

"So what if the well fed church in the homeland needs stirring?

They have the scriptures, Moses, and the prophets, and a whole lot more"
Jim Elliot

I miss the kids in cambodia, simple, loving, hungry but wanting God

Why is it that there is so much here, yet we want more? 

And how come they have so little there & yet are so satisfied...

I think of the worldvision boy that has grown up with me over 7 years, 

and i see how that has been an investment of money & time that has borne fruit,

but why do we waste so much here? Trifling with games, spending on food, 

drink, merry making, shopping...what a waste...an utter waste...

"Too long have we been waiting for one another to begin!
The time for waiting is past! ...Should such men as we fear?

Before the whole world, aye, 

before the sleepy, lukewarm, faithless, namby-pamby Christian world

we will dare to trust our God...

and we will do it with His Joy unspeakable singing aloud in our hearts"
C T Studd

I hope that the lives I pour into here in affluent Singapore will not stay the same,

My best wish is that we would break out of our selfish, conceited toying with pleasures

To look upon the needs of those around us, 

not the needs of the same rich, abundant people we surround ourselves with...

but those who are genuinely struggling, for love, for food, for survival...

I miss seeing true compassion, miss seeing people who weep for the lost,

miss those who willingly give to those who cannot return the favour, 

miss the genuine affection of love that looks only to God, not man,

miss seeing people acknowledge God turning up in their lives...

If I were in God's shoes...might i feel like this?

Lonely...is this the loneliness God aches with when His children turn away?

Angry...how did God bury His old testament wrath with new testament Grace?

Distant...is this what He feels when people forget Him for the pleasures He created?

Unappreciated...because like the lepers, most take for granted what it cost the Saviour...

Broken...because nobody helped, they either threw stones, spat or kept away...

Love...because He doesn't fail to Love...

because even with all of this, God is God, He still Gives, Loves...

I'm a flawed, broken vessel, 

prone to wander, prone to moments of weakness, 

but i have the honesty & desire to use each ugly moment to grow

may my ugliness, flaws, weaknesses & peeves shape me into Your instrument

In...my...brokenness, complete...because of You

Elizabeth Elliot on her husband Jim Elliot...

"Jim's aim was to know God. 

His course, obedience - the only course that would lead him to the fulfillment of his aim.

His end was what some would call an extraordinary death,

although in facing death he had quietly pointed out that many have died because of obedience to God.

He and the the other men with whom he died were hailed as heroes, 'martyrs'.

I do not approve. Nor would they have approved.

Is the distinction between living for Christ and dying for Him, after all, so great?

Is not the second the logical conclusion of the first?

Furthermore, to live for God is to die, 'daily', as the apostle Paul put it.

It is to lose everything that we may gain Christ.

It is in thus laying down our lives that we find them."

I'm a child of God,
Grace, Mercy & Love are His hallmarks, 

may they be mine too...

Thoughts; put into writing...

This blog is cathartic, and helps me clarify my thoughts

Just today, something interesting came to mind. I've found it simple to encourage by instantly saying the first thing to come to mind, it is usually the best & sincerest thing, and it naturally comes out well!

But I suddenly noticed this other, curious habit also...
When I have something difficult to address, I'll take the time to pen it down and i'll agonise over every word, every phrase, cut it, mould it, pray over it, delete it, use the clearest words possible, so there would be no misunderstanding possible...it is just something i do, and i've done it for as far back as i can remember, but i've really...hardly ever thought it was anything unique.

But yes, someone did ask me before, WHY do i do such a tedious thing? Why not just speak immediately when i feel strongly about something? Why do i hesitate & ponder over it? Bring it to writing and then speak?

Hmmm...i think that was a pretty good question! And i think i've the answer now...

To begin with, i think that words are a gift from God, they can build up yet they also easily tear down(& i think this is more true in fact!), and maybe because i've seen the destructive power of words, i consciously try to be careful to use it well, to encourage & build up people, more than to criticise or to lash out at people, & of course, I fail frequently too...but putting this in place helps me grow

Another reason why i agonise over words used is that, sometimes, there is this human nature to think things through, BUT only partly (but we think we thought it through!! irony! haha!)...and we fail to see it fully. Putting it down in paper helps me complete my thoughts and see where i might be missing the point and just going off randomly (thereby making no sense!) It does more justice to a situation and helps me see if i'm just making a mountain out of a molehill!

And yeah...today, i sort of had a little revelation on the bus back...cuz this old memory suddenly came back, of how i once read that the ancient bible scribes, because they revered the bible, and because of the immense respect they had for the Holiness of God, they would pray over every word, every pen stroke, and how they would ritually cleanse themselves so that they would write it correctly and not misrepresent God! And i suddenly had that epiphany, that what i was doing was divine also...no, i'm not being blasphemous here...but i mean it this way...

The writer is being moulded by bringing each word to God, allowing Him to sanctify as they write, and crafting the words as led by God. In it, inherently, the writer is absorbing more of the truth of God, owning and appropriating it more deeply, and ultimately, they end up being shaped by God because of their immersion in such an intense activity!

I just spent a whole afternoon crafting several different documents, each to clarify & help me process, and i've discovered...that for each one of those documents, even as i've crafted them...the initial thoughts and the end result have become pretty different! Each has become more loving, clearer in it's challenge, and more honouring to God.

And the thing i give thanks for the most, the writer has also been shaped and moulded in agonising through each of these documents.

This has been a precious, lovely day. Thank You Lord! =) Love you! =D

What Faith Can Do...

Some songs are just...RICH with meaning, this is one of them...


ok...i'm sick, time to sleep...





Everybody falls sometimes
Gotta find the strength to rise
From the ashes and make a new beginning
Anyone can feel the ache
You think it’s more than you can take
But you're stronger, stronger than you know
Don’t you give up now
The sun will soon be shining
You gotta face the clouds
To find the silver lining

I’ve seen dreams that move the mountains
Hope that doesn’t ever end
Even when the sky is falling
I’ve seen miracles just happen
Silent prayers get answered
Broken hearts become brand new
That’s what faith can do

It doesn’t matter what you’ve heard
Impossible is not a word
It’s just a reason for someone not to try
Everybody’s scared to death
When they decide to take that step
Out on the water
It’ll be alright
Life is so much more
Than what your eyes are seeing
You will find your way
If you keep believing

Overcome the odds
You don't have a chance
(That’s what faith can do)
When the world says you can’t
It’ll tell you that you can!

I’ve seen dreams that move the mountains
Hope that doesn’t ever end
Even when the sky is falling
And I’ve seen miracles just happen
Silent prayers get answered
Broken hearts become brand new
That’s what faith can do
That's what faith can do!
Even if you fall sometimes
You will have the strength to rise

radicalis...

Notice carefully what you do not see...

Paint a picture, it's not about me

Embrace the differences, sense the brokenness

If you catch sight of the scars, know that they mould humility

Perhaps we believe that dependence on our self is a strength,

but, have you even considered...that may be the path away, instead of towards?

Consider, with an open heart...how Love acted, what it did...

it saw the clamouring crowds, calling for a King,

then...was sent, a tiny baby, son of a carpenter, not highly exalted,

when flocks gathered, He gave & gave, then went away...

up a mountain, across a lake, into Samaria, where no one else went...

Authentic discipleship means following the Master's voice,

It was not a journey that led to a palace, but one that led to a cross

It didn't mean the acclaim of a respectable, all-knowing prophet or teacher,

but it was the humble truth & miracles of someone who was different

We forget that...& instead of an abandoned heart, following Christ

We have hearts desperate for comfort, desirous of trinkets,

We play with these cheap baubles and leave deep treasures unmined,

We taint our hands happily slinging mud, when we ought to be Joyously giving thanks

Do we know what is actually real? and what is truly death?

Death cannot touch this body without Christ's say so...

We've forgotten that to LIVE is Christ,

so we live powerless lives...

fearful in the face of trials,

caught up with discovering our place among others,

not seeing that our identity is only measured in relation to Christ

So much else is all...sinking sand

I wanna be near...near to your heart,

loving the world, hating the dark

I wanna see dry bones, living again...

singing as one...

Hallelujah...

Holy Holy...God Almighty,

the Great I AM,

who is worthy, none beside thee...

the Great I AM!

Awestruck & blown away...

Was just listening to some awesome bands today...

And I realise that awesome music hits me deep,

but not as much as the lyrics...

and then again...not as much as when i know the story behind a song

I think...i LOOK for that, i need to know the story...

because in hearing the story behind a song,

it causes it to come alive...even more

Gonna share one of my favourites today...

It was originally done by John Mark Macmillan,

then the Dave Crowder band did it also...

Both of those were led by the guitar...

Today, i saw one that was led by the piano...

And so...i share this fabulous version by Jared Anderson

It led me deeper & deeper into adoration of God...

if you'd let it...this is a little bit of what worship in heaven feels like =)

The video work was wonderful also!

And yes, this is the story behind the song =)

All to Jesus...I surrender

feeling really jetlagged...but i need to get this down...

Today, i realised something simple, small yet profoundly important.

We can talk about God, the attributes of God, His Character...everything

Yet at the end of the day, we can still miss His heart & the intent of the Message.

I saw this pretty clearly, & it's funny how we can say...
"Let the scriptures speak...",
and yet, totally miss the point when it does.

So yes, let me state this clearly and directly,
Tithes, offerings, etc...those things mentioned today
Those are clear biblical teachings, & to follow them, honours God.

But let me point this out,
if we give the 10% of gross income (tithe) + wadever offerings etc,
we're fulfilling the letter of the Law perfectly...

Yet...fulfilling the Law is wholly incomplete,
we miss the point of the new covenant,
and that is...

When God gave, He gave His BEST, His ALL, JESUS...
He did not hold back or just give 10% of himself,
His GIFT to us was a wholehearted, COMPLETE gift...
And that was the kind of generosity & Love shown to us

Let us not forget that God gave it ALL for us,
we are now His stewards of ALL the gifts that we have,
giving 10% shouldn't pain us one bit...
because we ought to know WHO owns it all & gifts it to us

Our response shouldn't be a stingy, penny pinching calculation, or a 10% thing,
we ought to be asking it the other way round...

If God counted us worthy, valuable & treasured enough to give us HIS BEST,
how can my response to Him be anything less than a humble response to His Love & generosity?

Of all the things in the world...i only want You

Hmmm...had time to think earlier today,

and it was pretty interesting...

Juxtapose that together with the session today,

Silence and solitude, and wow...totally awed

Mmm...guess my own words thru Wendy

and then thru Maverick, hit me again

"Train, NOT try"

"Train to be a disciple, not just try..."

It was so wonderful to be hearing that once again,

not just from them but the response when Wendy asked!

It's just in my wildest dreams that they would remember,

but yes, the youth stunned me today, because they DID remm!

And yes, I guess that's what I really want...

A generation that hears, takes it in and learns

I've been hearing this in so many variations that it's scary!

"What this generation neglects, the next generation forgets"

Edmund Chan

"Today's compromise is tomorrow's standard"

"Our ceiling will be the next generation's floor"

I believe in passing on a legacy of faith & faithfulness,

and I believe in putting in the effort...

and as i've been praying all along...

I really want to see the next generation step up...

and I want to see you be better & more faithful than us...

Please raise up and apprehend your destiny! =)

And I hope it starts once again in the youth,

that you will value the hard work of training in righteousness,

that you will see the value of such schooling in Holiness,

I dislike, maybe even detest the word TRY...
Because it seems like such a kop out...

An excuse, a reason to compromise...

But hey...we are all so much more than that...

and sometimes, the only way to live out our destiny,

is to refuse to make such compromises,

to NOT give ourselves a way out...

My simple way has been to replace the word "try" with "train"...

I'll TRAIN...I'LL TRAIN...

When we put in the effort to honour God,

when we do the painful act of surrendering what's His...

when we train ourselves to live for Him in ALL things...

that's where we begin to see the fruit...

Just like Rob mentioned in the "Noise" video today,

we have TOO MANY distractions,

We've forgotten the ONE,

the main needful thing...

and in doing so, are filling our emptiness with EVERYTHING else...

In this season of prayer & fast...

I think God is saying to us...NO MORE...

NO MORE compromise,

NO MORE easy-way-out
NO MORE but...i can't...

NO MORE fear or closet worries

Take the faith step...overcome that other thing...

that boulder that may seem like it's blocking you,

but is really just a pebble in God's sight...

but how many people are going to take up the challenge?

I hope...many many are...

Because the freedom that Christ won for us,

is not a weak, joyless, drudgery of an existence,

but a FULL, JOY-FILLED, MEANINGFUL life!