any, which, way...

Sometimes, it's hard to document down the litany of things that happen...
but i have got to try...so that this emerges from my system and into God's hands

1) 19 year old, Female, Chinese National, Scholar...
NTU Hall 13, found with a plastic bag over her head,
no forced entry, no signs of foul play, suspected suicide.

Was awash with emotions when i got the sms just now,
why would someone throw way her life like that...="(

Then I remember, Chinese scholars face alot of pressures over here,
they either do well, or they have to repay a bond that is WAY beyond their ability to,
many face so much pressure, that they do not see any meaning to life if they fail tests...
I do not know this girl's story...but this is Chinese New Year...
If she is still here instead of going back home...
It could mean she's not doing well, had no money, or could not face her parents,
and being in hall, alone, who knows what ran through her mind...

There have been suicides every year that i've served in NTU,
nobody can say that the spiritual battle is non-existent...
It is...and in the campus, i've seen that lives are lost every year...
And even as we determine to fight back...it is such a real battle,
and such a heart-wrenching one...my heart cries for each of these...

This has been really unwelcome news,
but, we have to do something about it...at least for the rest of them,

For NTU CCC, we have determined to do something about it
starting today, if you know a PRC student, or someone who is alone for CNY,
invite them to join you and your family for the festivities,
show the foreigners in a distant land, the Love of Christ...

And i want to spread the word here, let's do the bit that we can,
you never know if an invitation to dinner may save a life...

2) The cold & sudden change in pressure caused me to ache and limp,
once again reminding me that though it can be ignored,
I have something within me that is a "foreign object",
the metal plate with pins that holds my ankle together...

It is a necessary evil, and it will sometimes cause me pain at the most unexpected times.
When Paul was living with a "thorn" in his flesh...i wonder, did it feel like that?

Physical pain can sometimes be a living hell, or just a nagging ache...
But, when you know you have to live with it...
we'd just naturally find a way to make it happen...
So...resilience, perseverence & endurance...they all undertake that journey to make us whole.

3) Hidden within, scars...who can fathom the depth of pain within?
Let me share the words of another here...

"Faith, as I am growing to understand it more, 

is about looking beyond my circumstances to a person. 

To have faith in better circumstances, 

even in God creating better circumstances, 

is not true faith.

I want to be the kind of man who can watch every dream go down in flames 

and still yearn to be intimately involved with my friend the King, 

and still be willing to take another risk 

just because it delights Him for me to do so. 

And my flesh shivers to think about it."

~David Shepherd~

And this little poem that Wendy shared today... 

People are often unreasonable, illogical and self-centered;

Forgive them anyway

If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives;

Be kind anyway

If you are successful, you will win some false friends and some true enemies;

Succeed anyway

If you are honest and frank, people may cheat you;

Be honest and frank anyway

What you spend years building, someone could destroy overnight;

Build anyway

If you find serenity and happiness, they may be jealous;

Be happy anyway

The good you do today, people will often forget tomorrow;

Do good anyway

Give the world the best you have, and it may never be enough;

Give the world the best you've got anyway

You see in the final analysis, it is between you and God;

It was never between you and them anyway

~ Mother Theresa and/or Dr Kent Keith~

And so...for me,

God's way, any day, any possible way...every day

Don't be afraid of Loving til it hurts...

I see from today, that it is a gift...a sacred trust...

who will bother to...

just do it anyway