Tuesday, March 23, 2010

Place Your Life Before God - Romans 12 (The Message)

So here's what I want you to do, God helping you: Take your everyday, ordinary life—your sleeping, eating, going-to-work, and walking-around life—and place it before God as an offering. Embracing what God does for you is the best thing you can do for him. Don't become so well-adjusted to your culture that you fit into it without even thinking. Instead, fix your attention on God. You'll be changed from the inside out. Readily recognize what he wants from you, and quickly respond to it. Unlike the culture around you, always dragging you down to its level of immaturity, God brings the best out of you, develops well-formed maturity in you...

...If you preach, just preach God's Message, nothing else; if you help, just help, don't take over; if you teach, stick to your teaching; if you give encouraging guidance, be careful that you don't get bossy; if you're put in charge, don't manipulate; if you're called to give aid to people in distress, keep your eyes open and be quick to respond; if you work with the disadvantaged, don't let yourself get irritated with them or depressed by them. Keep a smile on your face.

Love from the center of who you are; don't fake it. Run for dear life from evil; hold on for dear life to good. Be good friends who love deeply; practice playing second fiddle.

Don't burn out; keep yourselves fueled and aflame. Be alert servants of the Master, cheerfully expectant. Don't quit in hard times; pray all the harder. Help needy Christians; be inventive in hospitality.

Bless your enemies; no cursing under your breath. Laugh with your happy friends when they're happy; share tears when they're down. Get along with each other; don't be stuck-up. Make friends with nobodies; don't be the great somebody.

Don't hit back; discover beauty in everyone. If you've got it in you, get along with everybody. Don't insist on getting even; that's not for you to do. "I'll do the judging," says God. "I'll take care of it."

Our Scriptures tell us that if you see your enemy hungry, go buy that person lunch, or if he's thirsty, get him a drink. Your generosity will surprise him with goodness. Don't let evil get the best of you; get the best of evil by doing good.

Romans 12 (The Message)

Monday, March 22, 2010

Thanksgiving

In case i forget...
Thank You Lord for welcoming me home with showers & thunder! =)
After 3 weeks without rain, it was somehow...wonderful to feel it =D

The clean streets, lack of honking, orderliness of out traffic,
it feels surreal that just 24hrs ago...i was dodging traffic,
sticking out my hand to slow cars down & hearing ceaseless honks!

I thank You Lord, that you made order out of disorder,
and that you're at work in the hearts of men the world over!
I'm thankful to have seen & participated in your work here & there,
catching sight of You and the open doors of men, that's truly awesome!

I'm thankful that i don't just feel like a worker in the field,
but i truly feel part of a family, Loved and being able to love back!
The true measure of your Love, came out throughout this 3 weeks...
and I'm glad for how you are the God of the "so much more"
and that you truly provide exceedingly, abundantly, more than we ever ask for!

I thank you that I have people to Love the whole world over,
and I thank you that we cannot Love God, if we do not Love man...
Thank You for people who are showing me Love so that i can Love better too!

Thank You for using Oliver, so young and so small...
I love the way he taught me the language...
and the way He hugged me tight that day...
and the best thing...
I loved the way he threw himself at me recklessly,
and then planted those kisses on my cheeks...
I wonder how much You want that from us to You God...
Thank You for Loving us, Loving Me...so much

Everything in my life has brought me here

I'm home...or am I, really?
Last year, i remember saying...
"The best part about going away, is coming home"
but this year...i'm wondering, where home really is...

Where I was...it was truly warm, friendly & loving,
people loved & expressed it truly...
whether it was in tears, kisses, hugs or touches...
at the airport, it was hard having to leave a 2nd time

And now, I'm home, but I'm remembering that this is not TRULY home...
when God really does call us home, that's where I think my heart will truly rest.
Now, i'm satisfied to be where I am...
learning to live each moment fully, wherever i am placed...

Don't get me wrong, I love where i was at for the past 3 weeks,
& I love the community I have here in Singapore too...
I miss people, love that i'll get to see them again...
But then again, i long for the greater reunion at the end of life's journey!

God, I think that you've really grown my heart these years...
learning to love...the people who are like me, people unlike me...all kinds
and really, i've seen how you've also deepened my heart to love...
Missing & loving are 2 sides of the same coin & i'm glad for the tension

I miss people, and I miss home,
I love people, and I love home,
And in it all Lord, I see the God-shaped vacuum,
I see how much I miss You, and that means, I Love You!

Awesome, AWESOME realisation! =D

What can separate us from the Love of Christ?
NOTHING...=D

Tuesday, February 23, 2010

Food poisoning...

Ok...i've reached a verdict...
the worst thing about food poisoning is...
when your stomach begins to cramp up...all the time

i felt like curling up on the floor and fainting earlier...
couldn't fathom why my stomach kept spasming...
gosh...this is really quite bad...

Please pray if you read this!
I need it...

Sunday, February 14, 2010

HAHAHA!

Ok...i must have been dreaming...
Just used anti-bacterial handsoap to wash my bowl and spoon...

I think it's now the cleanest bowl & spoon in the whole house! HAHAHAHA!

Thoughts like a choo-choo train...

This has been an...interesting Chinese New Year for me...

Interesting cuz after just moving home, and adjusting, this whole time is the first major holiday and yes, hahah! It's not much of a holiday after all! After my own moving and unpacking, i've had to help with everything else in the household, but yeah...the heavy lifting is pretty much my primary responsibility! I feel like a pack mule...=P

Along the way, sure there will be friction and all, and i noticed something that i've really not taken note of in a LONG while. Mmmmm...I remember my sister telling me before that i've to remember not to take everything mum says seriously, and haha! I found that very funny advice initially...

But lately, i've begun to see the wisdom in that
I think uh...my mum REALLY thinks out loud...or rather, her thoughts just flow from her mouth and they have no filter at all, so it is a constant stream of info, and she likes to micro-manage, so...a simple instruction to clean the doors of the house & the gate, will turn into an instructional of "Clean from here to there...NO!...like this, not like that..." Then, if she wasn't there to see it done, she would ask again and make it sound like we always never do stuff...And sometimes, in the end, she ends up doing it all over again!! hmmmmmm...*shrugs*

I thought i bore the brunt of it until that night when she lost her temper at my sisters, and then i realised that...haiz...when my mum is like that...no one is safe from her fury.

Still...my sisters have developed a method to help them cope! I realised that in the car to Reunion Dinner. When mum was talking, everyone else was able to zone out, or just turn on their music & then give the appearance of listening! HAHA! That rather amused me, cuz i always thought that would be pretty rude so i never did that, but because of that...i would just have to listen to everything...hmmm...maybe having an ON/OFF switch like my sisters would be good sometimes...i'll contemplate that...=P

But yes, knowing all of these, just reminds me of the battle that i've come home to fight...this is my time of obedience and i know i will be severely tested! But i keep reminding myself that God gave me time away from home for a long time, so that i could learn & grow with Him, now...the setting is different (more challenging) but the battle is the same...I want very much to share the Love of Christ with my family, Grandma accepted Christ already, FSP also accepted already...both of those were in their last years of life, i hope that for Mum and this household, that will not be the case. I'm really learning lots God, and i'm applying lots too. But i know that's all i can do...so yes, God...please do your transforming work in the hearts of people, because much as i see i need it, i know that it's not just for me alone.

Let me be your messenger of Good News everywhere i go...especially at home.
I want a Reunion...but not just a Reunion Dinner every year...

I'm greedy...
I hope to see a Reunion, in heaven, for all eternity

Thursday, February 04, 2010

Far more beautiful

Had afew tremendously invaluable chats today...
And they led me to reflect on my life and all that has been...

Some people are blessed to be born into abundance & plenty,
A place where blessings like love, care & concern, get showered upon in droves,
Others have to walk in barren places, where the slightest bit of moisture is cherished,
Where the sight of an oasis would bring Joy & glee beyond what mere words can muster.

WHAT you go through, helps you appreciate what you have (or don't have)
and HOW you go through it, determines your outlook in life

Upbringing and circumstances are just one factor in life...
the other (more important one i venture) is our reaction to situations

I saw something on Sharon's post...
"The bravest & most important things that we do...
will probably never be known to anyone else, but ourselves"

And today...i think i did the most important thing ever...
it's not the bravest, but it required the most of me...
In fact, it required...all of me...

And yes, i believe that there are certain points in life,
that God brings us to, and at those crucial crossroads,
what we do (or don't do) are life-changing events.

I did it...today
Though it seems far from beautiful,
and though i wish there was an explosion of Joy,
yet...i'm left with something else...
But i know the feeling, and i know, it will pass...
The moulding, shaping & firing, those are uncomfortable...
but in the hands of the master I trust...
and when He deems me ready...
I will be far more beautiful that i could ever dream of at this moment

"Far more beautiful, more precious than the oil..."

This frail alabaster jar is ready to be poured out at the Master's call...

Saturday, January 02, 2010

Alabaster Jar

This song says more in less than i can manage right now...

Tuesday, November 24, 2009

Loss...why i study it...

Maria Chapman, the daughter of Steven Curtis Chapman, awesome Christian song writer...was killed in a tragic car accident 18mths ago...when his son accidentally knocked her down in the driveway of their home...it was a horrific family tragedy...and this is abit of their journey through pain...



This stirred my heart & emotions so much...and now...18 months later, i cannot help but wonder, how are they doing, and yes, knowing Steven Curtis Chapman, he will turn to God & it will find expression in his songwriting, and yes, i saw & heard this achingly beautiful song, full of hope, full of love, full of passionate desire...and so totally turning pain into something that honours God!

I love the part..."Heaven is a sweet maple syrup kiss...and all the other things i'll miss..." This is the stuff that signifies hope, strength & an innate trust in God, built through trials...it is a firm and unshakeable faith...one that is hardly seen, but a Joy to behold when apprehended!



Loss & Pain is NEVER easy to take, but within it...in the mysterious workings that God allows to happen, and then orchestrates for His purposes...within it, i see the Gold & Silver, the refinement pure as can be...a faith that radiates, In His hands is the best place to be, never forget that...

And lest we forget...God lost His Son first...and He did it in order to redeem us...wow...

Thursday, November 12, 2009

Hmmm...rambling on at 1am...

Wanted to sleep...but find myself unable to...
So many things and thoughts on my mind tonight,
None of them any real bother on their own, yet taken together,
they point to something particularly peculiar...

And now...i'm wondering of other things too...

I've always wondered what the prophets of old made of God's voice,
like...why did he give funny instructions? Like lie on this side for X days,
then turn over and lie on the other side for Y days? (Read Jeremiah)

Then...how could he ask Hosea to marry Gomer (a harlot...or prostitute in our day)
and he asked his ppl to march round a city for 7 days...& 7 times on the 7th day...
and then...the walls fell down!?!?!? WHAT?!?!?! Mind boggling...

Is it any wonder that following God demands a step of faith?
And oftentimes...many steps...because it is a Journey of Faith...
Faith trumps fear any day, yet, the reality of Faith demands...a step...
I know in whom i have believed, and i believe that He is able...He's Able

Life is not scary, it is a certainty...as long as you know WHO holds it...
I've got my eyes set and ready to follow, yet...also...i see the many things i love,
the things i wish i had, and sometimes i want them now...(selfish me...)
then i remember...be patient...be patient...i have the whole of eternity to do all of that...
but i only have this one life to live, and my days are numbered...

I do what I do because I believe in God, and love Him...
and i've this life to live, not just for myself anymore,
but I live to show what Love means and to point to that in eternity,
my pleasures now cannot compare to the time to come where tears are no more,

I acknowledge i have loves...
photography, cameras, colours, loft houses, wide & wild expanses,
music, words, i admire beauty for sure, guitars, simplicity, and none of this is "bad"...
yet none compares to what is promised in eternity...
and yes...i can wait...

Good things come to those who wait...
I can delay this gratification, because i know they are fleeting for now,
and yes, just a foretaste of what is to come =)
For that, i'm thankful!

Monday, October 19, 2009

Friday, September 18, 2009

It's BURNINGGGGGGGG!!!

*cough cough cough!*
I'm hacking like an old man again...

And yes, it's cuz of the haze & the 7th month incense...
Ok...incense is mild...it's like...a chimney
or rather as Sher tweeted it...an incinerator!!!

Gosh! It was really bad as i was walking just now,
wanted to run but couldn't because as far as i could see,
people were burning along the whole length of the HBD blocks,
and yes, i reasoned that if i ran,
i'd probably just pant harder & breath in more bad air...

Stepping into the house wasn't much better,
the smoke had entered the house and couldn't escape...
I just closed my room door, swung the fan to blow the fumes out,
and then re-entered later on...that helped...thankfully!

anyways...i'm just home to drop my stuff,
hopefully i can go hide out at some aircon place,
and then that would prob be the best air i can get tonight!

Sometimes i wonder, what would happen if childhood asthma,
or bronchitis erupted again...that would be terrible...
I'm gonna try to evade this, cuz my lungs are susceptible to haze...
But yes, i see the silver lining...

Thank You God for the rain!
I totally appreciate it clearing up the air!!
You're awesome Lord! =)

Thursday, September 17, 2009

stuck in 2 minds...

Thanks Minyi for the tip! =)
It works! But now i have a dilemma! HAHA! =P

When i couldn't get blogger to work,
I went to set up an experimental account with wordpress,
and now, as i look at the way it's formatted and all,
i sorta prefer that now...cuz of the simple format,
yet how it also looks like a magazine! =P

So...looks like i'll just confuse everyone and myself,
and just blog on both sites...hahhaha!
At whatever suits my mood then =P

but yes, i'm thinking, more magaziney stuff will prob be at wordpress
then here...well...randoms and all! HAHA!

From the mind of a confused person...
and oh...i shouldn't be blogging, this is lunch/work time!

So...if interested...the address is rudydavid.wordpress.com
No tagboard there, so just leave comments if you wanna
No one really tags me anyway! HAHA!

Tuesday, September 15, 2009

churning...

My stomach is rolling like a washing machine...
giving me the weirdest and most uncomfortable sensations...

And...I wish blogger were less buggy...
cuz i can't post pics eventhough i want to...

Well...not going to complain,
today, i got more sleep than i had most of last week
so yes, that is a great thing!

There is a silver lining in everything!
Thank You!

Tuesday, September 01, 2009

Thank you Teacher

In ancient times, “Teacher” was a term of respect...
a figure of awe, a person who was endeared to the people...
Nowadays, “‘Cher” is pushed around,
suffering a certain marked disrespect...

And those are teachers who have a title!
who hold the job description, and work in a school.

And then...there are the teachers who teach daily,
parents, elders, people who care, leaders...
these “teachers” without the title...
who ever remembers them?

Putting up with the rancour of disdain,
the bitterness of deeds going unappreciated,
the pain of love given out, and being trampled upon,
the million tiny cuts of ungratefulness
the pure hatred of people who misunderstand...
the putrid stench of a life living in active rebellion

Does anyone care anymore?
Maybe because they do not...
that’s why we have such days...
it’s not a mere holiday,
it is a celebration...
and I want to celebrate...

I celebrate the lives of the faithful men & women before me,
those who have lit the path ahead clearly...
who tolerated my rebellion, yet who spoke to me in love,
those who guided me with a gentleness I did not deserve,
those who corrected me firmly because I needed it,
I want you to know I appreciate you,
I love you, and because of each of you,
I’ve chosen the path i’m on...
One of honouring God who made me,
Living my life in service to others, just like you all did.

My mentors, you are teachers who believed in me, poured into my life,
gave me a place to find myself, so I could crucify who I wasn’t.
I thank you, and I LOVE you more than words can say...
This side of heaven, I cannot thank you enough,
but my greatest gift back to you, and my greatest celebration of you...
will be that...i will be one of the horde of people lining the way...
patting you on the back, thanking you for bringing me into the Kingdom,
I will be your guard of honour, testifying of your faithfulness,
as you meet with the King of Kings so that He might reward you!
You are invaluable to me! Treasured greatly!

Thank you Jun Choi, Gary, EK, Les & Wen, CY & Robin,
You’ve sowed intentionally into my life through its various seasons,
Your lives give praise to God and I thank you for your faithfulness.
You are people who exemplify Christ, yr example has blessed me,
and your faithful witness brings glory to God!

Thank you all! I’m proud to call you my Teachers.

Monday, August 31, 2009

mourning into dancing...



Story behind the song...
http://www.buzzplant.com/mercyme/homesick/

It's remarkable how similar a season this has been for me...
& yes, the lyrics...which talk about being homesick...
they speak volumes to me

I think that the haunting tune,
the sadness of it all...
it somehow soothes my soul,
because it connects with me,
with the very real need to grieve...
to mourn when it's needed..
to cry because the hurt is genuine

yet it connects even more for me...
in the sense that I KNOW this world is topsy-turvy,
it's gotten messy, broken, sin-filled, ugly...
and yes, i grieve for that...
why would we ever give up Eden for this?

But the truth is...we do...
each day, we easily mistake God...
we ignore, disregard, utterly disrespect Him...
He's unappreciated, sidelined, cast aside...
Only to be clung onto when ALL goes wrong

Yet, in moments of revelation...
God shows how He is the One who holds creation,
that apart from Him, nothing else holds ANY meaning
And yes...that leads me to think about Home...
the place where my heart truly is...
There is a place that one day...Joy truly is eternal,
Worship is really ALL that we emerges from our being!

Right now, we have to bear with one anothers weaknesses,
love inspite, cherish despite, and esteem greatly...
And therein, learn to enjoy the glimpses of Heaven that emerge,
Anguish will not last forever, hurt is fleeting,
pain will disappear, but in Christ we can be healed, fully!

The journey entails some hardship, some pain,
some surprises we might dislike greatly...
But the Promises of God stand before us as a foundation,
The Victory of Jesus has been won already...
The Light of Home, that cherished rest is before us...

But not when the journey isn't finished...
Our lives are a legacy meant not just for ourselves,
the footprints left behind lead the way for others...
Like the many kings in the bible, some good, some bad,
at the end of the day...how will our names be?
Will they be sullied? Will they be spoken of well?

How will your name be?
How will MY name be like?
I determine to live my life in one manner...
unapologetically, one way...
In the way that Honours God fully

If that means being misunderstood, made fun of,
mocked, spoken badly of...so be it...
He endured worse on the way to calvary

If i'm only spoken well of...
and it's because i spoke only what people wanted to hear,
What a great disservice i have done in compromising truth

I only want to live a life that worships & honours One...
A life of faith, fidelity, faithfulness & fruitfulness...
A life that cannot be measured by eyes that see the world,
one that lives to the beat of heaven...
For Him who turns mourning into dancing...

11You have turned for me, my mourning into dancing; You have loosed my sackcloth and girded me with gladness, 12That my soul may sing praise to You and not be silent O LORD my God, I will give thanks to You forever. Psalm 30:11,12

Tuesday, August 25, 2009

what can i say...?

Sometimes the concept of loss is an abstract one,
other times, it is all too real...and painful

Home is where my heart is...
and i've never been through a more homesick period...than now

I'll hold on, cuz I want to see You again,
But i feel so out of place sometimes...left out

When I attempt to look above & over,
the niggling nagging lingers, so I just...hold on


The past few months have been months of loss,
I've been on an extended journey for sure...
Mine was a private one, a loss that had to be mourned privately,
Because of that interminable length of time,
Yet, at the end of it...salvation came

Last week, I learnt the meaning of hurting...REALLY hurting
Hurting because the body of Christ, my family...was hurting

Then, there were the temporary yet similar...heart-rendings
Of people leaving on jet-planes, to lands of wondrous seasons

I look back, and see...that a whole generation,
my peers, they have disappeared, what happened,
I may never know...but...it's lonely...sometimes

Last nite, one more sudden loss...
I feel that my heart has been repeatedly pierced this season,

Yet, I know that God has given His comfort & His word & His promises

I see...
Job, suffered loss,
Simon Peter, had the pain of rejecting Christ
Paul, had a perpetual thorn in his side
The Heroes of the Faith, yet they went thru tough moments...
In there...was God ever missing?

NO...
The devil had to ask God for permission to put Job & Peter thru trial,
Paul only had that thorn because God allowed it to keep him humble...
God is still on the throne

One thing that i've learnt in this season...

We do not stand on the explanations or reasons that we get...
Even if ALL our answers got answered, we'd still be asking WHY??

We do not stand on the explanations or reasons that we get...
We stand on the promises of God.

Is God enough for us?
The trials we go thru will show us...

Sunday, August 16, 2009

HAHHAH!

I saw this shirt on Threadless!


Haikus are easy
But sometimes they make no sense
Refrigerator



It made me laugh out loud! =)
HAHA! Just found it pretty smart!
I have such a weird sense of humour!
But then...it's a tee-shirt,
So i guess others have the same sense of humour as me!
Raise your hand if you laughed at it too! =D

*RAISES HAND UNABASHEDLY!* HAHAH! =)

Saturday, August 15, 2009

Haiku'd

Bigger Perspective
King of Glory Came to Save
He cares about You so much!

Try to change, can you?
How long will it be this way?
Get up and Follow!

This complacency
Leads to apathy, come now,
Why are you waiting?

Maybe someday soon,
There will be no more crying,
Just grins and smiling!

Holy Spirit Lives,
Don't live a defeated life
We have victory!

Thursday, August 06, 2009

Bus ride thru my memories...

It's amazing how a bus ride can speak to one's inner being...
I was surprised to be brought on a fond ride through memory lane,
as the bus weaved its journey of monotony through it's pre-planned route...

I wonder if the driver, driving this route countless times,
did he ever have flashbacks of the past?
Of something interesting or memorable that happened along his route...
because, today, for me, I took a trip into my past, and THAT was wistful and wonderful!

Funny how somethings...like a familiar landmark,
a sudden smell...can bring back memories roaring from the past!
And even more interesting is how some memories can be so vivid and realistic!
Seems like it was just yesterday that those things happened!

And the progression of the journey,
that whole time seemed like a procession through my life!
Procession...brings to my mind, Chingay, or a funeral! HAHA!

Life in the past, those were filled with a mix of harsh and also fond memories,
I wonder who i may have been if i'd not been shaped the way i was through them.
And so...whatever thoughts they wrought, i am thankful, and yet, longing...

I can't help looking at the signposts of life...
they mark a road past, but also...signposts mark the way forward
I see and I am excited, very excited, and yes, it is that hallowed Joy

Sometimes, we linger in the past,
other times we long for the way forward...
In some rare instances, we manage to savour the individual moments
those beautiful "In-the-moment" times where everything falls into place,
and we delight because of the pure Joy in that!

I think we've been given multi-dimensional senses,
for multi-dimensional living...
And that's why we derive such Joy from all our moments!
Past, present & future!

I've figured that in my life, the best way to maximise my existance,
is to learn from the past, apply it to my present, and aiming it for the future.
That helps me in my decision making and alot of how i live life

Sometimes, i take for granted that this is just being prudent...
and i get derailed when others make an unthinking hurtful comment
But i thank God for reminders such as this, this beautiful bus ride...

When God has spoken, and given instruction,
it is best to be humble, accept correction,
so that we may be wise...

Prideful men fail in this,
we think that we are right, so no instruction is needed,
so we just brush it aside as rubbish...
Or...our pride is hurt, and we refuse any help...

The irony of it all?
When we are prideful, we will be humbled...
brought to our knees by painful circumstance...
so...why not bend our knees first?

I think being on bended knee is rather divine,
it marks humility, it reminds me of a position of prayer,
it shows me someone secure, not bothering to run...

And so...I wanna learn from the past,
apply it to now, and hopefully, the bended knees?
that's a picture i see more in the future! =)

Hear counsel, receive instruction, and accept correction, that you may be wise in the time to come.
Proverbs 19:20