True Beauty

"That which is beautiful is not always good;
but that which is good is always beautiful"

I'm a believer of the bible, and at it's core, the bible speaks so much truth, about how beauty can never been seen in the exterior, only in the interior...

"You see the depths of my heart...yet you love me the same...you are amazing, God"

And truly, the true Joy that a person gets is only in discovering the simple truth of the matter.

That which is GOOD is ALWAYS gonna be BEAUTIFUL!


Lord, i pray that your truth and your goodness will never be obscured in your people. And I pray that your beloved ones will also learn to recognise your truth so that in all situations, they recognise the good that comes from you instead of the deception that may come from aesthetic beauty that obscure a woeful inner life. May our walk always speak loud! And may it always speak of you!
In Jesus Name, AMEN.

What a season!

Bruce Springsteen said,
"A time comes when you need to stop waiting for the man you want to become and start being the man you want to be."

The quote is attributed to Bruce Springsteen, but i think God is wiser, He knew us so well and He knew we would always be plodding along in this journey trying to rely on our own strength, so His encouragement has always been persevere, keep on doing good, never give up, Hope in the Lord, lean not on your own understanding! I am the Vine, you are the branches, if a man remains in me and I in him, he will bear much fruit, but apart from me, you can do NOTHING!

"Everyone is looking for a quick fix, but what they really need is fitness. People who look for fixes stop doing what's right when pressure is relieved. People who pursue fitness do what they should no matter what the circumstances are." Kevin Meyers

Yups...i don't want quick fixes, i wanna learn, persevere, press on always, sit humbly and wait on the Lord, listening intently, trusting always, cultivating love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control! Like in a garden, the fruits take time to develop, and even in the seemingly "barren" seasons, God is working and the roots are taking in nutrients to nourish and grow the fruit!

God is too wise to be mistaken.
God is too good to be unkind.
So when you don’t understand
When you don’t see His plan
When you can’t trace His hand...
trust His heart.

Yeah! I trust His heart! Always have, always will! It has been a wonderfully fruitful month and a half away, and it was an amazingly blessed time especially the past week in Korea, doing things i love with the Lord i love, and people who have given everything to be there, and it was not only a great time learning, serving, and being inspired! But also, spending quality time with quality people, something that really blessed me! =) The Lord is really amazing in the ways that He plans things! I stand in awe at His wondrous Love! And what a journey of Faith this is! =) WOO!

I'm back!

Yes, i'm home! =)

Flying off again on the 29th til the 9th tho! will update when i can!

Off for a month...=)

Pray as the team goes forward!

May we achieve each and every milestone prepared by the Lord for us! =)

Thank you for your partnership in Prayer! =)

Why? Why? Why?

Psalm 121
A song of ascents.

I lift up my eyes to the hills—
where does my help come from?

My help comes from the LORD,
the Maker of heaven and earth.

He will not let your foot slip—
he who watches over you will not slumber;

Indeed, he who watches over Israel
will neither slumber nor sleep.

The LORD watches over you—
the LORD is your shade at your right hand;

the sun will not harm you by day,
nor the moon by night.

The LORD will keep you from all harm—
he will watch over your life;

the LORD will watch over your coming and going
both now and forevermore.

Who knows what i'm going through? No one...no one but you Lord.
And though my heart is torn, i'll praise you in this storm...

Praise you in this storm - Casting Crowns

I was sure by now, God, You would have reached down
and wiped our tears away,
stepped in and saved the day.
But once again, I say amen
and it’s still raining
as the thunder rolls
I barely hear You whisper through the rain,
“I’m with you”
and as Your mercy falls
I raise my hands and praise
the God who gives and takes away.

And I’ll praise you in this storm
and I will lift my hands
for You are who You are
no matter where I am
and every tear I’ve cried
You hold in your hand
You never left my side
and though my heart is torn
I will praise You in this storm

I remember when I stumbled in the wind
You heard my cry to You
and raised me up again
my strength is almost gone how can I carry on
if I can’t find You
and as the thunder rolls
I barely hear You whisper through the rain
“I’m with you”
and as Your mercy falls
I raise my hands and praise
the God who gives and takes away

I lift my eyes unto the hills
where does my help come from?
My help comes from the Lord, the maker of heaven and earth
I lift my eyes unto the hills
where does my help come from?
My help comes from the Lord, the maker of heaven and earth

words by Mark Hall/music by Mark Hall and Bernie Herms

This brokenness, senselessness, darkness, pain, unanswered questions, weariness...Every tear i've ever cried, you hold in your hands, you never left my side, though my heart is torn, you heard my cry to you and raised me up again, my strength is almost gone, how can i carry on if i can't find you?

I lift my eyes to you Lord...I will praise you in this storm. I CHOOSE to Praise you, I CHOOSE to be thankful, the troubles i have are "light and momentary" as compared to your eternal Glory! Thank you Lord, truly...i thank you...in faith, i believe, and i thank you...

Been awhile...

It's been such a long while since my last post!
Guess it's the busyness that comes with preparing for graduation, helping with the video, juggling work, time with people who need it, doing my newsletter, sending it out and meeting people, preparing the trip admin details, many long meetings to hammer out the program and all, on top of planning for the year ahead and doing transitioning...gosh...busy busy!

But also, in the season of extreme busyness, i'm learning to discipline myself more on the TRULY important stuff. Somedays, i just can't do it...i just feel like taking a rest day and crashing into bed, but yeah...God is always good and faithful! Just have to pray a little more and remember that i have a strength that is beyond mine! Pace myself well, so i dun burn out and return early to rest and recharge!

I read this today in my morning devotion...and it just made me smile! =)

"THE LONGING of the soul for God only makes itself felt when all lesser delights and earthly joys are relegated to their right place."

I think that inner longing is always there, but sometimes it is brushed over in the busyness, or forgotten by neglect. And yeah, God is jealous of us that way, desiring for us as a bridegroom for the bride! Competing passions are actually setting themselves up against the Rock of Ages, so yes...we have to learn the lesson of submission and setting the Right thing in the Right Place daily, the more willingly we do that, the better for us.

Sometimes, we get blind to what is truly our focus and when we have to be re-directed, there are grace-filled ways of the Lord, and there are also grace-filled, yet painful surrenders of the things we have clung onto too tightly. When we're forced to surrender, it's mainly cuz we have held on to something too tightly, of our own volition.

So yeah...may the longing for my Lord, constantly be my number 1 passion!

I think I'm a funny person!
In a world that is so visual, so upfront, and out for promoting self, i much prefer taking the backseat, doing the background, or groundwork matters that make something tick, and those are not the most glamourous jobs! yeah...prefer to leave that to those who relish the limelight! I'll much rather be a man of substance, a person of character, far above "looking good" to man, or standing in the place of limelight. I've always done the little things, and yes, some appreciate them, and others overlook them, i used to get rather wistful at that sometimes! Then i realised that if i did feel terrible when i'm unappreciated, it's probably cuz i'm actually longing for the praises of man! So deceitful is the heart of man! I'm glad God in His grace allowed me to see and realise that...it matters little now, cuz yeah...i'm really NOT doing it for man, i've realigned, it's now my own act of stewardship, my service to the Lord! And yes, when i recognise that i'm feeling wistful, i now know why, and that helps me deal with it much better! =)

Yeah...last year, was really a watershed year for me, many things have changed, and i've learnt more and more about myself, and yeah, examining motives more than actions, wanna continue in that vein and be refined under the Master's hand!

That best portion of a good man's life,
His little, nameless, unremembered acts of kindness and of love.
-- William Wordsworth --

May i always give the best portions of what i have! =)

What are your standards?

Before a man can do things there must be things he WILL NOT do.
~Mencius~

What will you not do? Where are your OB (Out-of-bounds) markers? I like this term...i learnt it in my journalism class, and it has always struck me as a wise statement! =)

In the local journalistic reporting context, when OB markers are mentioned, it seems to convey a negative vibe, an area best left unventured, an area that we should practice self-censorship.

But instinctively, i sense that in everything, we must have a certain standard, certain rules we live by, some things that we do not compromise, something that we will NOT do! Imagine playing a game WITHOUT rules, yeah...we played one such game before (at least, we thought it had no rules!) and in the manual (notice i didn't say rulebook! hahaha!) It ended with this line "...Any other disputes should be settled by loud arguments among the players, with the owner of the game having the last word."

Ahahah! =) So...we see, at the end of the day, even in conflict resolution, there was a need to set a certain standard, a person with the last say.

Similarly in life, even if we refuse to acknowledge it, we all have taken on a certain set of rules which help us govern our actions. And actually, one of the best gauges of our standards is to ask...What is it you WILL NOT do?

It's easy to make statements like "I'll try anything once", "I'm game for it"...we live and are shaped by peer pressure, "One-up-manship" (always trying to be better then someone else), we always seem to appeal to people's sense of fun, daring them to do all sorts of things.

Yet...how many people challenge us in the things that are really important? Helping us set standards so that we know exactly what we will and will NOT do! I've been reading biographies again, and i've seen a certain pattern...the best sports coaches, they may not have been the best players of the game, but they were certainly masters of the RULES of the game! The better they knew the rules, the better they could play the game! In soccer, a keen knowledge of the rules is needed to know how to use the offside rule, especially now with the rule that if a player is not involved in play, he's considered "inactive"!

Hmmm...there are so many parallels that can be drawn, but yes...living outside of boundaries, living in rebellion to the laws, being unconscious of our standards...these things will cause us to stumble and fall when the times of testing come.

We have an unchangeable, immovable, divine and eternal standard in Christ, so let's be clear on what the Living Word says so that we hold to the RIGHT standards!

The Way

But to deviate from the truth
for the sake of some prospect of hope of our own
can never be wise,
however slight that deviation may be.

It is not our judgement of the situation which can show us what is wise,
but only the truth of the word of God.

Here alone lies the promise of God's faithfulness and help.
It will always be true that the wisest course for the disciple
is always to abide solely by the Word of God in all simplicity.
~Dietrich Bonhoeffer~

Does God ever oversleep? If He doesn't, then why do we hurry, engage in such hustle and bustle, why do we rush about so quickly we hardly slow down to listen for His still, small voice? Don't we believe that God has His eyes and His hands on things? Why do we act like He IS sleeping?

Does our life ever seem like a maze? A crazy series of twists and turns, seemingly without rhyme or reason...are we...in reality...lost, floundering and just making the best of a bad situation? Trying to make the best decisions we can? Where is God in this?

His answer?

I am the Way, the Truth and the Life!

While our nature demands that we see the road ahead, or that we're given a set of directions to reach there, we often fail to see that we hold the answers in our hands...but we lack the understanding to apply it.

I am the Way...- God is saying He is the roadmap, He is the direction giver, or...more correctly, He is the direction! We ask for a roadmap, a compass or the road, Jesus says, cling on to me, I'll provide all of those because I am the Way, you just have to cling on to me! Can we accept such a simple yet utterly faith-dependent answer?

The questions post...

To do God’s work is to do what is right when no one is looking …
and doing what is right when everyone else is compromising.
- Charles Swindoll

We're living in such uncertain times, a time when standards seem to have decayed beyond repair, where broken families, fractured friendships, strained relationships, all lay down amidst the carnage of a life lived for the momentary pleasure, the temporary gain, the instant gratification of our wayward desires.

We hide the ugly reality of our lives with a thinly veiled veneer that hides the parts that are crumbling just beneath that fragile facade. Where are our moral foundations? Why do they crumble so much, and SOooooOo easily?

Is it easier to cover over our imperfections? Hide them? Like applying putty to mend a crack? Foundation to hide facial flaws? Is it cuz we're asian that it is easier to leave things unsaid? Pretending to sweep things under the rug, when they are actually still there, just bubbling under the surface?

Being in the people business, i've always wondered if i will ever grow cynical to the point where i treat everyone with suspicion...i think that would be a very sad day. I've constantly relied on the Lord to keep me tender, to Love with His Agape, to be unconditional in Love, and it's a constantly humbling journey, one that is also frequently painful. It is true that hurting people hurt people, i've seen that happen time after time, and i've felt those stings of undeserved assaults, and yet, i cannot give up, it's not in my nature, cuz i believe God will never let go!

I know why it is easier to hold on to a mask, to keep up a masquerade, put on a facade...the simple reason is that it helps us cope with the pain, we can hide our hurt, cover the flaws, try to mend the scars. To show people our innermost being is to be vulnerable, it means being comfortable in who we are, it means, revelling in however imperfect we may be. It means that we glory in our weakness! And it is exactly how the Lord wants us...open, honest, vulnerable, being ourselves, showing our weaknesses, pain, hurt, ugly, unlovable natures, because only in realising how wretched, how inadequate we are by ourselves, can we reach the end of our rope, and then...the only answer that will satisfy at that moment would be....Jesus Christ, Lord and Saviour.

Who are you when no one is watching?
Do you do the right thing when everyone is compromising?
Whose standards do you keep? Yours or the Lord's?

In line with the whole theme...i'm not perfect, i struggle to keep doing the right thing, but i'm trying. I'm learning from Daniel 1, he knew God's standards, and he saw where it would challenged. To others, food may be "a small matter" YET Daniel DID NOT compromise!

Daniel knew the black, and he knew the white, and that knowledge helped him navigate the grey areas in life!

Do you know biblical standards?
Do you know how to apply biblical standards to daily living?

Dearest Lord Jesus, you know the hearts of your people far better than we think we know ourselves. I pray that you will plumb our depths and fill us with your Love, your desires, your immovable standards, may our lives be anchored on the solid Rock that doesn't move, so that when things around us shake, we may see as you see and be your Light of Love in those moments. In Jesus Name, Amen!

WARNING! Gross post!

You know that you're REALLY sick when you try to throw up...
and all that comes out is

PHLEGM....

ahahaha! Sorry if i grossed anyone out! What a nonsensical post! =)

Easter! =)

HE IS RISEN INDEED!

WOOHOO! =)

The significance of Good Friday to me...

Joy!....and tears...

My heart is brimming over with such Joy! This is so wonderful, so amazing! The reason why i love doing what i'm doing! =) Today at youth Alpha, we had 15-20 people choosing to receive Christ! And 1 came from my group! Woo! And yet again...i'm awed to just be a little clog in this, playing my little part and taking such satisfaction in it! =)

and then some other news struck me and whoa...reality hits home...and it hits hardest on the things closest to our hearts...

i just saw the news...and the latest news is that 28 people are dead from a tsunami in the pacific ocean that hit the Solomon Islands.

*ouch...*

It is truly amazing what happened today, 15-20 people choosing Christ and entering the Kingdom, yet...how many of those 28 didn't? I can only imagine what God feels...on the one hand rejoicing at every lost sheep that is found again, and yet...heartbroken at those who lose their way and never get found again...ever...

I remember this quote from my Christmas present (thanks buddy)...

"In heaven..There is one thing we can NEVER do...we cannot share the gospel"

~Dave Davidson~

Today, i caught a glimpse of this stark reality...people are entering the kingdom, yet others are being lost to it...forever...i know i'm not called to be superman, and there is only one Saviour, but yeah...i see very clearly that this is my season to step forth, to walk boldly, to tread the road, to walk the talk, to live out this faith that i've professed for so long!

"C.S. Lewis said that we have the tendency to think, but not to act
and to feel, but not to act.
If we go on feeling and thinking, but not acting,
then one day we will be unable to act."
~George Verwer~

It's time for me to act, and yes, i've taken those steps of Faith already! No turning back! This is going to be a great adventure and i'm looking forward to it. And yeah...i realise the reality of it all. As i heed the call, it might mean leaving everything that i've taken comfort from so far...but yeah, can i stomach disobedience to the call? No way! I'm taking God at His Word! =)

I know that obedience to the call is so much more compelling and it truly is on my heart!

"If a man does not keep pace with his companions
perhaps it is because he hears a different drummer.
Let him step to the music he hears
however measured and far away."
~Henry David Thoreau~

I hear the sound of a heavenly drum, and as i step to it, it means breaking with the familiar, sacrificing the good, choosing the best, staying close to the Lord and being obedient all the way.

Like Ginny Owens put it, "...He never said it would be easy, He just said, i'll never go alone"

And yeah...in the end, God's word is the ultimate, He speaks truth that is irrefutable!

"Do not merely listen to the word, and so deceive yourselves. Do what it says." James 1:22

Whom God Chooses

Whom God Chooses

When God wants to drill a man,
and thrill a man, and skill a man,
When God wants to mold a man,
To play the noblest part;
When He yearns with all His heart
To create so great and bold a man,
That all the world shall be amazed,
Watch his methods; watch His ways.
How He ruthlessly perfects
When He royally elects!
How He hammers him and hurts him
And with mighty blows converts him
Into trial shapes of clay
Which only God understands;
While his tortured heart is crying,
And He lifts beseeching hands!
How He bends but never breaks
When His good He undertakes.
How He uses whom he chooses,
And with every purpose fuses him;
But every act induces him
To try His splendor out --
God knows what He's about!

Go then, earthly fame and treasure!
Come disaster, scorn, and pain!
In Thy service, pain is pleasure;
With Thy favor, loss is gain.
I have called Thee, Abba, Father;
I have stayed my heart on Thee.
Storms may howl, and clouds may gather;
All must work for good to me.

Henry F. Lyte

What's on my heart...

May the words of my mouth-Tim Hughes

May the words of my mouth and the thoughts of my heart
Bless Your name, bless Your name, Jesus
And the deeds of the day and the truth in my ways
Speak of You, speak of You, Jesus

For this is what I'm glad to do
It's time to live a life of love that pleases You
And I will give my all to You
Surrender everything I have and follow You
I'll follow You

Lord, will You be my vision, Lord, will You be my guide
Be my hope, be my light and the way
And I'll look not for riches, nor praises on earth
Only You'll be the first of my heart

I will follow
I will follow
I will follow You

The quiet ones...

Kind hearts are quietly kind,
they allow cars into their lane instead of cutting them off,

give up their seats on the bus, or even...choose not to sit because others need it more,

the compassionate are quietly compassionate,

sowing love, showing care, praying hard, warring when no one is watching,

they recognise the battle, and war by their unseen acts of love

the humble are quietly strong,

no need to blow their trumpet, no need to get the fame,

doing their work, and building stronger roots daily

Paul planted, Apollos watered...but God is the one who causes the increase

Sometimes, we say...judge a person by his fruits...

But yeah...if God is the one causing the growth, then how?

I think the better measure is being Faithful in the task entrusted to us.

Build for eternity, set your sights high above, love wholeheartedly!

The heavenly exchange!

Just thought i would challenge myself again...see a good one-liner, and try to expand on it and see what thoughts flow, so yups...let see! =)

The heavenly exchange- what kind of transaction is this, that trades my rags for eternal riches? Pain (healed), sorrow (replaced with Joy!), burden (lifted), guilt (replaced with faith)!

The ability to call on my Abba Father, see the sacrifice of Jesus,
"It's so easy to call you Saviour, close enough to call you friend!"

I cannot fathom the nature of this exchange, God trading His only Son to die on the cross for my sins, in ADVANCE, before i was even made! It just boggles my mind!

Reminds of this quote i saw,

"Wanted before you were conceived,

Loved before you took your first breath"

~Soul Cravings~

For all those who have hurt or been hurt before (and that's everyone i figure...),

Do you feel that something has been ripped away? Stolen, left empty, broken?

Or does guilt, emptiness, fear, worry, the desire to run away, the pain of facing the same thoughts, facing the ugliness of self, the desire to "repair" the damage,

do these things plague you?

God's Heavenly Exchange is the one woven throughout the bible...

He says with a tender smile; and nail-pierced hands;

"I died to forgive your sins"

"I don't condemn you"

"you are washed white as snow"

"Because...I Love you"

And...in His firm Fatherly discipline;
"Now GO! And sin no more"

He has returned (and given more!) what others...had stolen away.

Only Jesus could do such a thing! =)

Grace and Mercy, Meekness and Majesty

John 3:16

Free!

"The freest person in the world is the one with an open heart,
a broken spirit, and a new direction in which to travel."

Yeah! The road ahead is wide open and amazingly exciting! =) It has been a very fruitful season of seeking the Lord, and now, with my compass set to true North, i'm following the roadmap that the Lord has prepared for me! It's exhilarating, it's such a sense of freedom, marked with a tinge of pain, and yet, the journey ahead is clearly marked out and with my focus is set!

Casting aside everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, i press on towards the goal...God is sovereign and i know He has a marvelous plan for my life ahead! I see the dangers, i sense the overwhelming bigness of everything, but yet, i KNOW that precisely because of the mammoth task ahead, God must be the one orchestrating it and since it's all in His hands, i've nothing to fear! Just press on! =)

I have been so blind for so long, how could i fail to see that by trying to manage everything i was actually holding back and not daring to risk anything? Now...the paradox is that, though people may see and think that i'm making a mistake or 'risking' everything, they do not understand that this is the way life is meant to be lived! An adventure, a life of faith, an endeavour of excellence, a life lived in the service of the King, that counts the poor and the downtrodden as valuable, that looks with eyes of compassion on scoffers and mockers. What richer life can there be than to spread the love of Christ, and see it warm a cold heart, break open a man of stone! There's no greater reward than to see the love of Christ reflected back to you in the eyes of someone who was stuck in the pit that they were in.

A life of poverty is one spent on our own leisurely pursuits, because the selfishness that is in our core then rises to the fore. I determine not to be one of those feeble souls who do nothing at the wayside. I desire to open my heart so that i may be used wherever and whenever, whatever high or lowly position, whatever status rich or poor, wherever He leads, i'll go. (Isa 6:8)

Prayer Engage belated entry...

Was looking through some photos and glimpsed on this picture that spoke to me once again...This was from my management project with Campus Crusade Engine Region, done late Jan'07...

It was Day one, and we were focussed on Purity. The prayer stimuli that we did (Yes, they were hand made!) was a black heart that could stand! I staged this shot, placing the heart there, symbolising the surrender of our blackened, wounded, sickened hearts to God, whose hands are BIG enough!

The caption that is on the "hands" poster is this...

"Prayer is not asking.

Prayer is putting oneself in the hands of God, at his disposition,

and listening to His voice in the depths of our hearts."

The 10 days of Prayer Engage! were pretty wonderful ones for me, and yeah...like the focus of the Engage says, "To build a movement of people intent on knowing God through prayer!"

I wanna see that movement of people knowing God intimately!

On The Cutting Edge

Some people talk about being on the cutting edge;

some actually live there.

Fewer choose to dwell on the bleeding edge of humanity,

where nothing is humanly certain except great need,

where risk defies other definitions,

where light shines the brighter for the enveloping darkness.